Pregnancy Diaries-1

I threw up for this first time this past week. It was at 3 am, it was so random. Sydney climbed out of bed, and into our room. I put her back to bed, and when I came back down stairs I ran to the bathroom. This one I am sick at night, and exhausted by 1pm. My house is struggling!! I just cannot seem to keep up. My cooking is almost non existent….my poor husband!! I am anxious for this period to pass. On Thanksgiving we told Sydney I was expecting. She was confused at first, but soon understood. We asked her if she thought it was a boy or girl. Sydney said girl!!! So we will see. We never told her or Sadie about Scott. For some reason Jeff and I felt confident in telling Sydney. It has been a struggle not telling people. Especially my amazing husband. I swear he gets more excited than me. He expressed to me the other night how hard it is not to say anything! I wish I could give him the okay…..but I am still nervous. I too wish I could tell people I was pregnant. I wish I could explain the hideous lovely pregnancy mask that has made it’s appearance this time around. I wish I could explain my tiredness/moodiness. I know for a fact I am going to get fat this time around lol. Subconsciously I find myself using food as a security blanket. I feel so vulnerable, and the only thing I have control over is food. I hate this mentality, and I wish I could kick it. Maybe later on I will loosen up a bit!! I am totally getting baby hungry. I don’t know how I will handle 3, but I don’t care!!! I know I can do it….