We'll look back someday, and I'll look at you and say "and I thought I loved you then": May 2014

It just feels like yesterday, I had a feeling something was up. After work Jeff, and I stopped after work to grab a pregnancy test. I can still remember, and feel the excitement, and nervousness I felt all at once. As I sat on the toilet, and prepared to pee on this life changing stick. Time stood still. Those next few moments changed my life. We were prepared to wait a few minutes, but two red lines popped up instantly. We were as shocked as could be. Happiness triumphed fear, and we never looked back...Until now. 4 amazing,life changing, YEARS later. I feel like I have not even had a chance to stop and take a breath. Time is slipping through my fingers, like an hour glass filled with sand. There is no stopping, the constant changing of time. At times this overwhelms me, and I get anxiety thinking about not having enough TIME. My sweet Sydney girl has helped me, more than ever really gain a true testimony of families for eternity. Although this time cannot be stopped, it can be extended. Oh what peace that brings to my soul. Sydney is such a special girl, and amazes me daily. I learn, and grow from her daily. Her presence in our family is essential to who our family is. Sydney never ceases to amaze me. She has the best memory. We can be doing a daily task, and out of no where Sydney will say "mama, do you member when.....". Some of these things I hardly remember. This year Sydney became a big sister, yet again. Her transition to Scarlett has been beautiful. Even with Sadie, there was never any jealously. Sydney has loved Scarlett, since the day we told her we were expecting. When Sydney ran into the hospital to meet squeaks for the first time. Time slowed down. Sydney KNEW Scarlett. To this day she will tell you all about Scarlett's birth. Sydney is pretty darn particular. If any one knows me, knows I am NOT particular. Must be a ~~curse~~ blessing from her father! So at times I find myself arguing with my 3 yr old, over which way you put your shoes on. Sweet little girl, is so smart. Sydney LOVES. She loves with all of her heart. Although Sadie can be rough, Sydney rarely fights back. At times I want Sydney just to lay it on Sadie, but Sydney never does. I have been so blessed to have mothered this sweet soul for 4 years!!! Sydney is one of the reasons I breath. She so precious to me.